Firing up the Canon

You settled into my dream.   Stared me from my sleep. And told me it was time for a birth.  I asked if I could stay by your side.  A tender “no” was pushed from your lips. I stood to leave while the others danced around me. Your fear and my rejection walked me out of that dream. That morning, grief was born. It poured from my body for 7 straight days. You ghosted my life with coffee, clowns, and diamonds -   A knowing that slipped between us. Then a person of your making began to stain my thoughts. He received the words I couldn’t say to you. And we connected over the beauty and pain you left behind. We both miss your song.

Anything processed in fear is altered, rerouted unexpectedly. Even the "healthiest" decisions. You skip the drink. The food. The person. The temptation. You expect to be elevated by the outcome. But if you are making the decisions carrying fear or resentment, the path to the desired outcome is altered. You miss the target, plundering only into more stress.