Tell each other the truth.
“I got a rock between my heart and my mouth / I know how it got there but I can’t pull it out and the bones that once moved my fingers over keys / are protesting in a fist on my knees / Gotta find a way to unzip my skin cos this is a stranger’s I’m living in” – Miss Higgins, Set me on Fire.
I haven’t written in months…or if we want to be completely honest…years. My words have been trapped somewhere inside of myself. Sinking deep below my skin before they ever find their way out. I lost a sense of purpose for them. Couldn’t get beyond my head to write. I have quite literally felt like a stranger in my body and my mind. Trapped by something unreasonable. Something I don’t understand.
I expressed my disappointment in this to a friend…and in conversation a chain of understanding presented itself.
I haven’t quite figured out how to get beyond it. But here I am taking a first step - a step bigger than I’ve made on my own. All because of a reflection of myself offered by a friend, a friend who took the time to speak to me candidly.
Long-standing friendships have something to offer far beyond moments spent together. They give us a window inside of ourselves… remind of us of who we are when we are having trouble standing up straight. They tell us the truth.
I challenge everyone to do that. Tell each other the truth. The good truth. The bad truth. The humbling truth. The sad truth. Don't be afraid to be emotional - it reaches people on a level so often missed in daily life.
And, sometimes all it takes to start making changes is knowing that someone is paying attention – that someone sees you and that you matter.